Last night, I was a bit punchy about the first round of layoffs that had occurred. Many good, hard-working people were sent packing. Everyone knew it was coming. It's not a reality until you see your friends -- gone. I was a bit miffed and succumbed to the possible that I might be going as well and challenged the man to bring it on. I was having a Scrappy-Doo moment and I should have known better, because I can't stand that character pup.The parking lot this morning felt like a car-cemetery. A foreboding and uncomfortable chill set-in under my skin. But I was fine. Until I realized that where I sit is in direct view of the office being used to counsel people - OUT. Was I to be called into that room. Rumors of layoffs on other floors kept coming at me while I watched one-by-one, members of my own area called in and let go. Holy cow, I never imagined I could feel the way I did. Time seemed to stop and I could not help but tear up as both men and women exited with tears. On other floors, entire groups were layed off. The reality set in, my team, IS going to get cut. We are not as important as I want to think we are. Remember, I'm the Optimistic Pessimist. I think positively but plan for things to go wrong. Oh crap, I did not plan well for this... and my optimism flew right out the window, several floors up. That is when this set in:
and we waited
and waited,
and waited
Our team was finally called in and we were given the news. We had been spared being layed off. We all let out a big sigh of relief. Then, the talk of survivor-guilt set in. Not long after that, I received a message that my former manager had been let go. I'm such a wuss, I just cried. What it boils down to, is that I have really grown accustomed to many of these people that I spend a majority of my life with. You can't help but care about them. While I am relieved I still have my job; I worry for the others. Pessimism sucks, but that is where my mind is for these people given the current economy.
I'll wallow for a moment and will drink till I'm silly Friday night with work-friends-family. Then I need to dig deep for my MMGL to come out. Because "Can't Never Could Do Nothing!" I'm going to help where I can.
Damn, where's my power-ring? Oh wait, there it is!!!
4 comments:
thank you for being there and I am glad we can get really really silly tomorrow.
All the power of OA channeled through your will power into those little emerald rings couldn't save the economy or prevent what is happening. It is painful and sad to see them go, no doubt,especially when you are one of the fortunate ones to keep our job, but I'm sure your sympathy and concern shows. I am sorry for your loss and theirs and stories like this send shivers down my spine. I use to think I was immune to the lay offs, but hubby and I have grown guarded as our state's economy tanks. I hope we all survive the crisis intact somehow. I'm selfishly glad you are keeping your job, in brightest day AND in blackest night.
I can't remember if you work for a certain company or not, but we work closely with a local company and got many calls from folks we worked with for years saying they had been let go, or their departments were all but wiped out... I am glad you are one of the more fortunate ones and you deserve a night in a drunken stupor... just be careful
*hugs* There were many tears in Lynchburg as well, as you know.
The way I see it.... co-workers are a lot more like family. You don't get to pick them, but they either become your friends, or you're at least forced to be with them 8 hours a day (or more) so you might as well get along.
If it makes you feel any better, my validation word is sackskin, which makes me giggle.
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